Ch. 3. (The Power of a Parent’s Blessing)

God’s Ancient Path : Seven Critical Times of Blessing

 

 Imparting Blessing as a lifestyle and at seven critical stages of life sets the foundation of identity and destiny that will empower generations to prosper. Although this life style of blessing is found in the Bible and is expressed through the Jewish culture. this is not just a Jewish way to live. God established these principles of blessing for every family. A lifestyle of blessing is one of God’s “ancient paths,” a term taken from the Book of Jeremiah.

 

 Thus says the LORD, “Stand by the ways and see and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is, and walk in it; and you will find rest for your souls. But they said, ‘We will not walk in it.’” - Jer. 6:16 -

 

 This scripture caught my attention many years ago as I realized that much of the family dysfunction in our day – the addictions, abuse, adultery, and abandonment – stemmed directly from the fact that many parents lacked rest in their souls. When a person lacks a deep, settled sense of intrinsic value (identity) and purpose (destiny), that individual’s soul will not be at rest. Instead it will continually search for love, significance, and purpose. As I have said earlier, blessing is God’s mechanism within families to bring a child’s soul into rest and impart a secure sense of value and purpose.

 

 A parent who has never received a parent’s blessing himself is continually searching for blessing and therefore cannot focus on imparting blessing to the next generation. In this passage in Jeremiah the prophet tells us that if we will ask for, embrace, and walk in God’s ancient paths, we will naturally find rest for our souls. Children who grow up in this kind of family environment will naturally experience rest in the souls.

 

 Unfortunately today none of the cultural safeguards God established to ensure blessing at these critical stages are still intact. Even a Christian parent would have to deviate significantly from the cultural norm to ensure his children were blessed at the seven critical stages in life.

 

 

Dr. Domingo (Pastor of Awesome Blesses Church in Pangasinan in the Philiipines) read this part

 

 

Why Do Jewish People Prosper ?

 

 Recently I came across a book called The Jewish Phenomenon by Steven Silbiger. 1 This book confirmed what I had suspected. Silbiger begins by saying his book “takes a positive position, that the Jewish people have been successful because of a combination of factors related to the Jewish religion and culture and a collective historical experience.” He then says there are things “everyone and any group can examine and learn from.” 2

Silbiger, who is Jewish, said his parents expected him to achieve economically and educationally, and he had numerous role models in his family, his community, the media, and cities around the world to reinforce that idea. Economic success was the norm in the Jewish community he grew up in. He writes:

 

Did I buy into a stereotype perpetuated out of ethnic pride, or was there a truth to it? Being critical by nature, I quickly uncovered some compelling facts that prove Jewish success is indeed a fact in America:

 

 The percentage of Jewish households with income greater than $ 50,000 is double that of non-Jews.

 On the other hand, the percentage of Jewish households with income less than $ 20,000 is half that of non-Jews.

 “The Jewish advantage in economic status persists to the present day; it remains higher than that of white Protestants 

     and Catholics, even among households of similar age, composition and location.

 Forty percent of the top of the Forbes 400 richest Americans are Jewish.

 One-third of American multimillionaires are tallied as Jewish.

 Twenty percent of professors at leading universities are Jewish.

 Forty percent of partners in the leading law firms in N.Y and Washington are Jewish.

 Thirty percent of American Nobel Prize winners in

science and 25 % of all American Nobel winners are Jewish. 3

 

footnotes

1. Steven Silbiger, The Jewish Phenomenon (Lanham, MD: M. Evans, 2009).

2. Idid., 2. 3. Ibid., 4.

 

 How could such a small percentage of the American population – only 2 % - account for such a large percentage of the educated, wealthy, and influential people in our society? Why would Christians, whom the Bible tells us in Romans 11 are grafted into covenant with the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob by the blood of Jesus Christ, not manifest at least the same or even better statistics than the Jewish people? This was baffling to me until the Lord gave me a deeper understanding of 3 John 2: “Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers.”

 

 As I read this verse, I saw the key reason Jewish people prosper in their natural lives in ways many Christians do not. They follow customs and traditions (ancient paths) established by God that have caused the souls of their children to prosper. Many Christians are alive in their spirit and have spiritual traditions that cause the spirits of their children to prosper. However, according to the verse in 3 John, prosperity in life and health is dependent upon prosperity in the soul (mind, will, and emotions)

 

 While Christian families may create a culture that causes the spirits of their children to prosper, Jewish families tend to create a culture that causes the souls of their children to prosper. So as new covenant believers, why don’t we learn how to create family culture that prospers both the spirit and the soul of our children?

You may ask, “So what types of customs and traditions do Jewish people practice that tend to cause their souls to prosper?” I believe the answer lies in the custom we discussed in the previous chapter: the parent’s blessing. As we have already seen, all parents are prophets to their children, but not all prophecies are from God. I believe the souls of Jewish children tend to prosper not only because of the weekly Sabbath blessing of their parents but also because their culture naturally facilitates the blessing of children at several of the seven critical stages of life.

 

 Although the concept of blessing is clearly expressed in biblical Hebrew culture and we see remnants of it in modern Jewish culture, I don’t believe God intended for Jewish people to have a monopoly on blessing. I believe God intended for the lifestyle of blessing and the impartation of blessing at the seven critical times of life to function naturally in every family and culture on earth. These traditions of blessing did not originate with Jewish people but are ancient paths originating from God and intended for everyone everywhere.

 

Blessing in Eighteenth-Century America

 

 Although it is an ancient path established by God, it seems parental blessing and the resultant prosperity of soul were much more common even in American culture as recently as the eighteenth century. I was shocked some time ago when I heard Christan historian David Barton give an American history lecture. I knew it must have taken tremendous courage and integrity for the American colonists to stand up against the most powerful empire in the world at the time, Great Britain, to establish a new nation. I realized they must have felt a great sense of destiny and calling to do so.

 

 I assumed that to possess the courage, character, and settled sense of identity and destiny that it took to found a new nation, most of these early Americans had to have been seasoned veterans of life, people at least in their fifties and sixties. I was shocked to learn that several founding leaders who are household names now were in their teens or early twenties when they performed the acts for which they are now famous.

 

 Perhaps most notable was John Quincy Adams. He apparently began his diplomatic career at age fourteen when he accompanied Francis Dana, whom the Continental Congress had appointed US Minister to Russia, as his secretary and interpreter of French. The two were on an official mission to Russia designed to secure diplomatic recognition of the newly founded United States. Adams was later appointed US Minister to Holland when he was still in his twenties.

Besty Ross was only twenty-four when she is believed to have created the first official American flag. Then there were Alexander Hamilton, James Monroe, James Madison, John Marshall, and the French Marquis de Lafayette, who were all between the ages of nineteen and twenty-five when they played significant roles in the American Revolutionary War.

How many fourteen-year-olds would you be willing to send overseas as a secretary and interpreter for a diplomat? If you ask your average fourteen-year-old about his purpose and destiny, you will probably hear about video games, TV shows, and goals to be rich and “have fun.” Two hundred years ago people commonly practiced law and medicine, started businesses, and got married at ages sixteen, seventeen, and eighteen.

 

 Here is a scary thought: How many of the thirty-year-olds you know would you be willing to send overseas as an ambassador from your nation? Oftentimes even many thirty-year-olds today do not display the integrity and sense of destiny that were evident in fourteen-year-olds two hundred years ago. Why not? We have departed from God’s ancient paths.

 

 Apparently even in the United States two hundred years ago there was different sort of confidence, maturity, and character in young people than there is today. Why? I believe the answer rests in impartation of blessing from parents to children, a tradition that was still more intact even in American culture two centuries ago. Before the Industrial Revolution of the 1840s every child had a father, a family, and a future. Families ate meals together every day, and parents blessed their children regularly. Two centuries ago parents prepared their children to fulfill a destiny, not just to have a job.

Today many people are wanderers on the planet simply trying to pay their bills and keep their marriages and families from disaster. They’re searching for significance and purpose and are plagued by a continual restlessness. They constantly wonder, “Am I really loved or valuable? Am I doing anything that is truly significant or meaningful?” These deep questions of the soul were meant to be answered by God through powerful impartations of identity and destiny that come when a child’s father and mother bless him/her at critical stages in life.

 

Blessing and Cursing Impact Generations

 

 As we have discussed, family blessing or cursing often determines the course of a child’s destiny not for one generation but for many generations. Both blessing and cursing are seeds that will reproduce after their kind for generations. Noel and Phyl Gibson in their book Evicting Demonic Squatters and Breaking Bondages discovered some very interesting statistics about two American families (Max Jukes’ family and Jonathan Edwards’ family) when they traced them over two hundred years.

Max Jukes was an atheist who married a godless woman. Some 560 descendants were traced:

* 310 died as paupers,

* 150 became criminals,

* 7 of them murderers, 100 were known drunkards,

and half the women were prostitutes.

The descendants of Max Jukes cost the US government more than 1.25 million dollars in 19th century dollars.

 

 Jonathan Edwards was a contemporary of Max Jukes. He was a committed Christian who gave God first place in his life. He married a godly young lady, and some 1,394 descendants were traced:

* 295 graduated from college,

* of whom 13 became college presidents,

* 65 became professors,

* 3 were elected as US senators,
* 3 as state governors and others were sent as ministers to foreign countires,

* 30 were judges, * 100 were lawyers,

* 1 the dean of an outstanding law school,

* 56 practiced as physicians, one was the dean of a medical school,

* 75 became officers in the military,

* 100 were well-known missionaries, preachers and prominent authors,

* another 80 held some form of public office,

* of whom 3 were mayors of large cities,

* 1 was the comptroller of the US Treasury,

* and another was vice president of U.S. 6

 

 It is amazing that none of Edwards’ descendants were ever a liability to the government. Understanding the natural consequences of the choices made within these two families, one can conclude that someone born into the Jukes family would have been more likely to have had a difficult time in marriage and child-rearing than a person born into the Edwards family.

 That does not mean the family a person is born into determines his destiny. No matter what a person‘s family background, he can always choose to make wise, godly choices that will improve his marriage and family relationships. He can choose to establish a lifestyle of blessing that will put his children and future generations on an entirely different track. At any point, it is possible to recognize and break the power of negative generational patterns and leave a godly heritage.

footnote

6 Nancy and Phyl Gibson, Evicting Demonic Squatters and Breaking Bondages (Drummoyne, Australia:Freedom in Christ Ministries Trust, 1987).

 

 

Key Questions Answered by Blessing

 

In the introduction I mentioned that there are seven critical stages in life during which blessing was meant to be imparted within a family. At each of these critical times I believe God intended to answer a key spiritual and emotional question in our hearts. In the next several chapters we will look at each of these critical stages and the deep heart questions answered at these times. Because this is so critical to any parent wanting to establish a culture of blessing in their families, I have included a chart below that summarizes what to expect in each stage.

 

Major Life Questions Blessing Answers
Critical Time of Blessing	Major Life Questions Answered
Conception	Am I wanted and welcome in this family ?
Time in the Womb	Am I accepted and safe? Do I belong here ?
Birth	Am I what you expected and wanted? Am I OK, or is something wrong with me? Will anyone take care of me?
Early Childhood	Is there anyone I can really trust to meet my needs? Is there anyone here bigger, stronger, and wiser than me who truly loves and cares about me?
Puberty	Do I have what it takes to be a man/woman? Am I adequate to fulfill my calling as an adult?
Marriage	Am I really lovable? Will anyone love me and stick with me in covenant long-term?