Section (5) (Could You Not Tarry One Hour?)

SECTION FIVE PEOPLE: “And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. ’’ 

 

CHAPTER (14)   GETTING ALONG WITH EVERYBODY

 

 You’ll never play basketball for me again!” the junior high coach threatened angrily as he marched me off the court toward the sidelines. But the fury on his face and the determination in his voice let me know this was more than a threat； it was a fact. Why hadn’t the coach asked to hear my side? Hadn’t he seen the other kid throw the first punch? And why hadn’t he just suspended me for a game or two instead of taking me out of play altogether? Those questions clouded my mind the rest of the year as I rode the bench, but I consoled myself with the thought that I’d get to play for another coach when I passed to the ninth grade. But it wasn’t to be. The coach was promoted right along with me, and I sat on the bench my freshman year, and on into my sophomore year. Finally, we got a new coach and I was allowed to play again, but the damage had been done. By that time, tangled roots of bitterness had established themselves deeply in the soil of my heart. Years later when I was a seminary student, the Lord convicted me of that bitterness, and I wrote that coach asking him to forgive me for the grudge I had carried against him.

 

 Why was it so important to ask his forgiveness? As Christians, you and I are in the process of becoming full grown in God. Part of the process of spiritual growth is learning to forgive one another because our relation¬ship to our fellowmen affects our relationship to God. God will not extend mercy to those who refuse to forgive (see Mark 11:25-26).
 If husbands and wives learn to say, “I’m sorry. Please forgive me,” their marriages keep growing. If not, the marriages die. This is true of any relationship； learning to forgive is an essential element of growth.

 

 May I ask you a personal question? Does a dark cloud rise up on the inside of you when you think of certain people? If so, you need to understand that God uses those who sin against us to teach us how to forgive. And we can never forgive others until we know that we ourselves have been forgiven. Because we are forgiven, for Jesus' sake we forgive others. Can you see why forgiveness is an important key to spiritual liberty, victory and joy? As you pray, “And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors,” there are certain things you must do if you want to get along with everybody all the time.

 

Ask God to Forgive You

 

 Often as you thank God for the blood ofjesus, the Holy Spirit puts a finger on some sin you need to confess and forsake. So when you pray, ‘‘Forgive us our debts,” ask God to look into your heart. If unconfessed sin surfaces at this point, confess the sin to God and claim His promise, in 1 John 1：9： “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

 

 In that verse the word confess means "to speak the same thing.” In other words, we must agree with what 
God says about our sin and be willing to turn away from it.
 But the debts Jesus refers to when He instructs us to pray, “Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors,” encompass more than just our sins. The term also refers to personal debts or moral obligations connected to our relationships with others. That brings us to the second thing we must do if we expect to get along with everybody all the time.

 

Forgive as Often as You Want to Be Forgiven 

 

 Take a moment to study this question which Peter put to Jesus： “Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?” How would you have answered?
 Listen to Christ's reply： “I say not unto thee, Until seven times： but, Until seventy times seven” (Matt. 18:21,22). What was Jesus saying? He was teaching： Forgive as many times as you are offended. Why would Jesus make such a statement? Because that is how many times He is ready and willing to forgive us.

 

 Next, Jesus told Peter a parable which reveals tremendously important truths about forgiveness. This familiar story is found in Matthew 18:23-35, and it teaches a great deal about forgiveness.
 First, Jesus uses the parable to teach us that God has forgiven our great debt of sin  a debt so huge it would be absolutely impossible for us ever to repay it. The servant in this parable owed the king 10,000 talents, approximately $10,000,000. But the king forgave the servant and canceled his enormous debt.

 

 That’s not the end of the story, though. A fellow servant owed the forgiven servant a debt of 100 pence (about $20), and the forgiven servant made a moral decision not to forgive the debt of his fellow servant； instead, 
he had him thrown into prison. What is the truth conveyed here? That our debt against God is greater than any debt a person will ever owe us and that when we refuse to forgive another person, we place that individual in bondage.

 

 When the king heard what had happened, he asked the forgiven servant a question which is one of the most pivotal in the New Testament, for it is God’s question to each one of us： ‘‘Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee?” (v. 33). This tells us we are to forgive at the same level we are forgiven by God. Once we realize how much we have been forgiven by God, we can freely forgive others. If you have trouble forgiving, ask God to give you a revelation of Calvary and the price His Son paid for your forgiveness.
 Jesus wraps up the parable by describing the king’s anger toward the unforgiving servant. The king delivers the servant to the tormentors. The lesson? If we do not forgive, God will deliver us to tormentors until we choose to forgive others.

 

 You might as well get this straight. If you do not forgive, you will live with tormenting memories and demonic oppression until you release the person and forgive. If you don’t forgive, Oral Roberts, Billy Graham, Kenneth Hagin and James Robison could agree in prayer and dump two five-gallon buckets of 40-weight oil on you, but you would remain in torment. Why? Because deliverance will not come until you choose to forgive.

 

Maintain a Right Attitude Toward Others

 

 How is it possible to have a right attitude toward everybody all the time when some people are hovering around like vultures waiting for you to fail? The mean¬ing of the Hebrew word translated “enemy” in the Old Testament is “observer”

一someone who is critically watching. There are always people waiting to point out your faults, hoping you will fail. So how do you maintain a right attitude?

 

 The key to a right attitude is preparation. Don’t put off deciding how you will react to those who wrong you until the hot breath of the enemy is steaming up your glasses. Each morning before you walk out your door, make a willful decision that you will respond with love and forgiveness toward those who offend you. Decide that you will not allow unforgiveness to rob your spirit of victory, joy and peace. That simple decision can save you a lot of grief. How do I know? Because I have let unforgiveness rip me off, and it was no fun.

 

 After my roommate Jerry Howell and I were filled with the Holy Spirit at Dallas Baptist College, things didn’t run too smoothly. We lived in a dorm with 430 Baptist preachers, and most of them did not like what we had. It wasn’t that Jerry and I were running around trying to promote our experience as the ultimate doctrine in the theological world； it was just that it was apparent to all that something fulfilling and exciting had happened to us, and that irritated some people.

 

 One day the spiritual leader on campus confronted me. He was 35; I was 21. He was six-foot-seven； I was five- foot-seven. He weighed in at about 260； I tipped the scales at 132. Thank God the confrontation was verbal and not physical. So this guy scowled down at me and growled, “Larry, if you lay your hands on and pray for anybody else, I’m gonna’ pray God will chop your arms off right at the elbows.”
 The Lord gave me grace and I was able to reach up, put my hand on his shoulder and say, ‘‘I understand why 
you feel like that, but can’t we be brothers?”  Yet as I walked away, thoughts about what I could have said and should have said flooded my mind. My tranquil little river of peace boiled into scalding steam. Boy, was I mad. (Ac-tually, I told myself I was just hurt. That’s a nice word for angry.)

 

 So I did what you should never do if you want to get over an offense. (I’ll borrow five rhyming words from Marilyn Hickey to describe the process.) First, I cursed it. I muttered to myself, Where does this guy get off, talking to me like that? Who does he think he is, anyway? Git him, God!

 

 I didn’t yet know God sometimes allows offenses to help us grow and mature, so my next step wasn’t any better. I nursed it. I let that ugly little offense curl up in my lap and become my bosom buddy. I coddled it, petted it, fed it. And, sure enough, it grew. Then I rehearsed it. I enjoyed full-color, slow-motion instant replays of the offense in my mind. Oh, yes. I even edited it to make myself look better, magnifying the injury I had suffered.

 

 But when I finally got tired of reruns and was ready to get on with life, I had this full-grown offense follow¬ing me around. Ignoring it didn’t do any good. Trying to push it away from my mind’s threshold didn’t work. How was I supposed to get rid of this loathsome thing? Finally, I found the solution. I dispersed it. I gave it to God. I confessed it and forsook it. I humbled myself before God and sought His forgiveness, cleansing and strength.
 And then, do you know what God did? He reversed it! He turned it around, and the thing that could have become my tombstone became instead a stepping stone to victory and maturity. 

 

 Romans 4:25 tells us Jesus “was delivered [over to death] for our offenses—not just for the offenses of others against us, but for all our offenses against Him. Forgiveness is what Calvary is all about. Therefore, “Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you” (Eph. 4：32).
 When you forgive, you release into God’s hands the person who has offended you. You drop the offense, let it go, and give up your right to hurt the person who has hurt you. Then you become a candidate for the supernatural. The peace of God that passes all understanding guards your mind, and God Himself, in His own time and in His own way, vindicates you.

 

 Years ago I served under a church staff member who seemed ‘‘out to get me.’’ He kept a critical eye cocked in my direction for over a year and did everything he could to make me look bad.
 One morning in staff meeting he said, “We don’t have ‘flakes’ on our church staff.” Then he glared at me and barked, “Larry, stand up.” Wondering what on earth he was about to do, I slowly stood to my feet.

 

 Turning to our fellow staff members he announced, “The other night several of us from the church went out to eat, and Larry 'walked his check.’ I’ll have you know that we’re not gonna’ have people on this staff who walk out of restaurants without paying for their meals.”

 

 I could feel my heart pounding. I struggled to keep my composure. I had not “walked my check.” A business¬man from the church had whispered in my ear, “I know you’re late for your television taping so go on ahead. I want to pay for your meal.’’ I had thanked him and left. I was completely innocent of this man’s accusations. Besides, calling someone a “flake” is fighting language 
in Kilgore, Texas, where I grew up! But I had been praying, praising and flowing in the river of the Spirit that morning, and the Holy Spirit would not let me open my mouth. So I just stood there quietly until the man felt he had made his point and told me to sit down. Then when the meeting was dismissed I went to my office and prayed it through, forgiving and releasing the man to God.

 

 Before long, word of this embarrassing incident got around to the man who had paid my check. (Ironically, he was twice as big and mean as I was.) He stormed into that staff member’s office and let him know in no uncer¬tain terms exactly what had happened at the restaurant.
 Five minutes later the staff member, his face as white as a sheet, was in my office apologizing. I accepted his apology and had no hard feelings toward him because I had chosen days before to forgive him and release him to God. When I took that step, I became a candidate for the supernatural, and God came to my defense just as He promised to do： ‘‘But don’t be afraid of those who threaten you. For the time is coming when the truth will be revealed： their secret plots will become public infor- mation’’ (Matt. 10:26, Living Bible).
 

 Isaiah 26：3 pledges, “Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee.” That word ‘‘stayed’’ actually means “sustained,” ‘‘supported by.” Don’t fret about the offense. Lean on, rely on and be confident in Him, and He will come to your aid, help you to stand and comfort you.
At this very moment the Spirit of God is defying the spirit of anger, revenge and unforgiveness that has ruled in your life. 

 

 You can continue to curse, nurse and rehearse the offense, or you can disperse the thing right now in prayer and allow God to reverse it. Remember, you must choose to forgive, for forgiveness is not an emotion but an act of the will.
 You have a choice to make about this test God has allowed to come your way. Will your reaction to the offense fashion it into a tombstone or a stepping stone? It’s your decision. Make it count!

 

Review Questions
1.Below are statements concerning forgiveness. If a statement is true,

   write “T” in the blank provided. If it is false, write “F.”
  a.  God uses those who sin against us to teach us how to forgive.
  b.  Forgiveness is an important key to spiritual victory, freedom and joy.
  c.  An attitude of unforgiveness is a reason for unanswered prayer.
  d. When John tells us to confess our sin (1 John 1：9), he is saying we must agree with

       what God says about our sin and be willing to turn away from it.
  e. Jesus told Peter to forgive a brother who sinned against him, but no more than seven times.
  f.  Your debt of sin against God is greater than any debt an offender will ever owe you.
  g. When we refuse to forgive a person, we put that individual in bondage.
  h. If we do not forgive, God will turn us over to tormentors until we choose to forgive.

 

2. Summarize on the lines below what you are to do daily in order

    to maintain a forgiving attitude  
   
3. What do you think this statement means： “Forgiveness is not an emotion. It is an act of the will”? 
 
     
Prayer Outline

 

I. Ask God to forgive you.
    A. Deal with your sins. Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal areas in your life that are not pleasing to God.
    B. Confess your sin. Agree with God and say what He says about your sin.

         Ask Him to help you hate your sin with perfect hatred and to deliver you from its dominion.

         Praise His name, Jehovah-m’kaddesh), ‘‘the Lord Who Sanctifies.”
   C. Do not allow condemnation. Remember： You are the righteousness of God in Christ.

        You are complete in Him.

 

II. Forgive as often as you want to be forgiven.
   A. Meditate upon your great debt of sin that God has forgiven.
   B. See your sin actually causing Jesus’ suffering on the cross.

       Get a mental picture of the blood shed for your forgiveness.
  C. By an act of your will, forgive those who have sinned against you and release them to God.

       Pray for those who have wronged you.

 

III. Set your will to forgive anyone who sins against you this day.
  A. Make up your mind to return good for evil by the grace and power of the Holy Spirit within you.
  B. Make this faith declaration： “I will love my enemies.

      I will bless them that curse me and do good to them that hate me.

      I will pray for them which despitefully use me, and persecute me (see Matt. 5:44).
 C. Pray that you will begin to experience the fruit of the Spirit in your life in greater measure：

      love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, meekness, temperance and faith (Gal. 5:22,23).